I have long believed that the secret to finding a lasting partnership is less about meeting the one but rather about meeting some one who you find attractive and interesting but who also — and this is crucial — wants the same kind of relationship that you do at the same time that you want it.
This can apply to casual relationships as much as serious ones: Being real friends-with-benefits requires the highest level of emotional honesty and communication in order to make the parameters of the relationship clear and avoid hurt feelings. Your point that advertising this on your profile may elicit creepy messages is not an irrelevant one, but I do think for maximum efficiency you should be pretty clear that you are looking for something casual because of your existing commitments.
And you do want someone who is very sex-positive. One option is to look for people with similar profiles to yours: If your tastes run to the kinky, you could also consider investigating in apps and sites that are more open about their focus on sex, such as Fetlife. Once you do decide to meet people, remember to take the same precautions that you would if you were dating for more romantic reasons: Dear Eva, I am 37, a single mom and am looking to find someone , but not a boyfriend.
Basically, I want someone to have sex with and not much else. Be honest with yourself. The best way to avoid this situation altogether is to find your casual sex friends through an online adult dating website like Mixxxer.
Here are a few tips to keep in mind to make sure your own experiences are rewarding, fun, and fulfilling in all the right ways. Always be sexually responsible.
Never have unprotected or risky sex with a no strings attached partner. No strings attached relationships can be great ways to get over a bad heartbreak or a feeling of disillusionment with commitment in general. Remember, this is supposed to be fun — a great way to connect with someone else and fill your time without anything getting too heavy.
There are lots of different ways to settle on the right person with which to have a no strings attached relationship. Getting things started can be as simple as having a conversation with someone whose company you enjoy, letting things get a little naughty, and seeing where things go from there. State things in that order for best results and then take it from there.
A casual friend, an attractive acquaintance, a hook up you hit it off with, an old college acquaintance, or an ex coworker are all much better bets. There are no wrong reasons to want to end things. Maybe you feel like one or both of you are getting too attached and you want to back off for a while. Remember, honesty, communication, and discretion are the keys to success here just as they are in any other type of relationship. Keep that in mind every step of the way and all will go well.