Last week, I told a reader seeking sex advice to "never, ever — ever! He had been given the "green light" from his wife, who has admitted to a low libido, to have casual, non-monogamous sex. I urged him to try harder with his wife, but, if he had to, seek a casual arrangement with a willing party on the Internet. The contrarian responses were fast and furious: If he's looking for sex without the emotions, the e-mails and online comments and phone calls argued, a professional, monetary transaction is the way to go.
Everyone has a talent! I had not a clue this would cause an uproar. I thought most people were on the same page — I mean, we're talking about reducing someone's daughter to a paid means for sexual enjoyment. So I felt it important to clarify, to dig deeper into these pro-prostitution beliefs that had rattled me for days. This debate isn't about the criminality of sex work, a heavy and complex subject filled with grey areas — that's a matter for the Supreme Court of Canada, which is currently battling all sides of the debate.
At issue is what values embody worthwhile sex, and my philosophy is this: Whether it happens during a one-night stand, a summer fling, a friends-with-benefit arrangement or a life-long marriage, there must be a base human connection — two willing, interested humans agreeing to a good time — and a special, intimate experience. Stephen de Wit, a sexologist I talked to last week about what makes good sex and with a PhD in human sexuality, he knows a thing or two about good sex.
Even a casual, Internet-brokered one-night stand would be good for my reader in need, de Wit says. So putting a monetary value to this encounter, like getting your carpets cleaned or your nails done, removes all the fun. She's not there because she finds you attractive, charming or seductive, so what's the point?
The reader may not be looking for love — but he is looking for good, mind-blowing sex. I've never been into a strip club, for related reasons: I'd likely end up talking the ladies into attending night school, or walking my dog for a nominal fee. Yes, I write this from my middle-class pedestal. I've never fallen on life-threatening hard times, but I know this: Women, every single one of them, are worth more than their bodies. In an ideal world, everyone would see that. But clearly, I'm a newbie in this world.
In the interest of exploring all sides of the debate, I tracked down a friend-of-a-Facebook-friend who agreed to talk to me about his experience with prostitutes — or "prosties" as he called them — and why he frequents a Toronto brothel. Tim, a divorced year-old from Mississauga who hasn't had free sex in over six months, met me at a pub. I was shocked at how easy it was to find someone with personal experience and didn't know exactly what to ask. Thankfully, he wanted to share.
He admits that "regular sex" would be a better option, but says it's difficult to meet people in his circles. Still, "doing it with someone I see a lot … that'd be better I guess. He tells me about his lost love, his ex-wife. His eyes light up when he talks about their honeymoon heat — but they darken again when the conversation turns. He starts ranting about one lady in particular at the "house" he frequents.
His emotional attachment to her is clear "she's pretty and really sweet, you'd like her, I swear" and he genuinely thinks she cares about him. What about your safety? Tim's response is quick, and blunt: To be a prostitute also means to be promiscuous. Someone who demands payment for sexual services is someone who has sex indiscriminately, with multiple partners, during casual encounters. In this manner, all prostitutes are therefore promiscuous. However, someone who is promiscuous does not mean they are also a prostitute.
A promiscuous person will have casual and indiscriminate sex because they want to and not for monetary compensation. Once money is exchanged for sexual services, this makes the encounter prostitution. If money and compensation are not exchanged during casual and indiscriminate sexual encounters, then the individual is considered promiscuous. People who are prostitutes or promiscuous, engage in frequent sexual activities. These encounters are often with people who are virtual strangers.
Weather they meet online, at a bar, or a public event, often the two people are not familiar with one another. They do not know the intimate details of their lives or may not know their last name.
As a result, these encounters create risks and can be hazardous to their health and their lives. Many prostitutes and promiscuous people are at risk of being infected with sexually transmitted diseases. Incidentally, many of these sexually transmitted diseases describe the various people at risk.
They do not differentiate one from the other and there is no significant difference between the two that minimizes the threat of illness, disease, or infection. The risks are not associated with monetary compensation. Someone who is a prostitute is at equal risk as someone who is promiscuous.
The common denominator here is the number of individuals the person comes into sexual contact with. The numbers and statistics for sexual contact and risk exposure are phenomenal. However when we changed 5 sexual partners to 12 sexual partners the risk of exposure climbs significantly to an astounding 4, people Virgins For prostitutes and promiscuous people, they are at an even greater risk.
Consider the prostitute or promiscuous person who has had sexual encounters with 75 or more people. This indicates that they are at grave risk of catching an STD with a high rate of exposure. Someone who has had sexual encounters with more than 50 people, according to this study, has been exposed to more than 10, other people. These high numbers indicate how easy it is for someone to catch an STD even if they are not considered a prostitute or promiscuous.
It only takes one time to catch a STD. Considering the person who has casual and indiscriminate sex with multiple partners, their risk of exposure is significantly higher than their non-promiscuous counter parts.
Today, those who are prostitute or promiscuous is looked down upon in our society. Even as sexuality becomes part of American life, people are still looked down upon and thought of as sexual deviants.
As the saying goes, sex sells. Everywhere one looks, sex is on the market. Yet today, many movies show men and women involved in sexual activities. Despite the popularity of sex, people who are considered promiscuous or prostitute are looked down on. They are called bad names and associated with negative connotation.
These risks can be devastating to the individual and their families. The disease they are exposed to can be life threatening, some of which carry no cure, immunization, or anti-virus. For this reason alone, it is imperative that people who participate in sexual activity practice safe sex. This means protecting against exposure by using a condom. Condoms are the only way to minimize these threats. Condoms create a barrier between two people during sexual activity that reduce risks and minimize threats.
Weather someone is promiscuous or a prostitute they are at high risks of STD contamination due to their high rate of exposure. The European Union, n. You are commenting using your WordPress. You are commenting using your Twitter account. You are commenting using your Facebook account. Notify me of new comments via email.
Notify me of new posts via email. Conducting research, writing articles, essays, and blogging, I give informative information on a variety of topics and issues that affect society. I am a certifiable Language Arts teacher, working in education, social services, and mental health. Interested in my writing services?
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